Aside

Skip This Post; I’m Just Exercising

7 Oct

The temperature became warmer as we traveled into the evening.  From the Cumberland Valley into the Shenandoah the temperature increased ten degrees, even though it was four hours later in the day, and into the evening.  The warmth seemed to beckon me and say, “welcome home; have a little extra summer”.  I drove in my VW with the baby, and the HD drove behind me with Young G.  The trip took two days (potty breaks and a nursing baby) until we ended up in Charleston.

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It was late afternoon when we arrived, and by the time dinner was done and the boys were settled in, the sun had set and I finally stepped across the street and past the dunes to the shoreline of the Atlantic.  We were amazed by the Pacific for three years, but the Atlantic will always look, feel, and smell like home to me.  I was at the edge, just East of the pier, and felt the warm, frothy water float shells across my feet.  It was the same thing I had done — in the exact same spot — eight years earlier, when I came to South Carolina the first time to begin a life with my sweet man.  Once again I felt the ocean rinse off my past, and welcome me home.

When I moved away from home at 18 I went to college, and when I left college I went on a search for home.  There was a time I referred to myself as a gypsy, in the same way I would hear my mother use that phrase, because I didn’t feel connected to geography (or even community).  As I learned to know myself, and identify myself separate from the people I grew up with, I realized I am not a gypsy.  I’m not a wanderer.  I get those old “walkin blues” (another story for another day), but I prefer to be anchored in a community, connected to a large web of living, working, loving people.

I’m home now, and we aren’t moving any more.  The HD finished what he started in college and served in the military, but now it’s time for a season of LIVING life.  The permanence of home will fortify us so that we can extend out into our sphere of influence.

I don’t know what else to say.  I think this post should be private, just for me.  I still don’t know what I need to write about, but I’ll be diligent and keep writing.  With exercise the words will start to fuel my mind will start to fuel my words.  I’m reading well, and reading the Bible, too.  I’m working out.  I’m establishing a routine.

I want to already be “there”, and I’m feeling impatient.  Hopefully I will see results soon, and feel a switch click.  I’ve lived in anticipation for so long for My Place, knowing that I was pregnant with potential to make a difference, and now I’m here.  No more Army, no more moving, no more sleepless nights.  I have the blank page before me now, and the time.

My eyes are wide open, so I hope I don’t miss the opportunity.  If you can use anything, Lord, you can use me.

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